The Getaway

Breaking News: An unidentified naked male was spotted running down the main avenue of the cities financial district. Police were called in but failed to apprehend the suspect who vanished. Eye witnesses’ accounts describe the person as being in an extremely good mood and non-threatening:”… the only thing he was sporting was a real big smile” or “Dashing bloke, wish he had worn something underneath though...”. Police investigating the incident came across a discarded Blackberry on which the following e-mail was found:


For Immediate Release

Stockford Industries report 10% sales spike

18th February 2010-Stockford Industries reported a 10% sale increase in their agriculture machinery…. …I’m at the office and writing these lines embedded in a press release which I’ll have to send sometime during the day. It’s the best camouflage for my extra curricular writing sessions. No one is interested in bothering someone who looks like he is writing something as boring as a press release or some kind of invitation. Not that anyone from my room would object, the ruse is just for the assistant managers and our HR manager. HR Manager? Strike that, we don’t have anything resembling a human resource plan at the office. Probably the main reason why I’m intensely fixed at the monitor and hammering something on the keyboard 340 wpm right now. Looks like today’s post is going to be about my firm, which in my opinion has made some spectacular wrong business decisions. I won’t dwell on each one of them but the latest was the latest wake up call for me: My raise which was not only subpar, but also insultingly low –Mini conference held at desk right behind me right now, keep on writing without bating a lash-. Not that I’m the only one with the same problem. I’m one of the few who after hearing the raise didn’t storm the managers office and demand a proper raise. Me, I should have burned down the place but my lack of enthusiasm with anything concerning the office resulted just in a weak “Meh”. I rather spend my energy on an escape plan. The simple and brilliant one, where you leave everything on your desk and run like hell. Starting fresh, leaving everything behind. Especially an office which makes you feel like you’re buried alive for most of the day. Look at the weather outside, it’s beautiful. A spectacular spring day, the whole city basking in the sun. Ah fuck this…

The police are investigating a possible connection regarding the Blackberry and the identity of the mysterious exhibitionist.